de·ject·ed

–adjective depressed in spirits; disheartened; low-spirited

Synonyms
downcast
miserable
glum
gloomy
droopy
downhearted

Post-Collegiate Wisdom,

"Even for me, life had its gleams of sunshine."

"...it is madness in all women to let a secret love kindle within them, which, if unreturned and unknown, must devour the life that feeds it."

"I still felt as a wanderer on the face of the earth."

"He made me love him without looking at me."
-Jane Eyre (Charlotte Bronte)

"Its strange because sometimes, I read a book and I think I am the people in the book."

"We accept the love we think we deserve."

"I feel infinite."

"I don't know if you've ever felt like that. That you wanted to sleep for a thousand years. Or just not exist. Or just not be aware that you exist. Or something like that."
-The Perks of Being a Wallflower (Stephen Chbosky)

I need to rename this blog.

Because today is my second full day as a college graduate.

I no longer have the neon sign I always imagined hung over my head and declared to the world that I was a "student". I no longer have a to-do list that is dozens of items long.

Last night, as I was going to bed I tried to come up with an idea for what I could do today. I knew I was going to watch a lot of things on Hulu, but usually when that's my plan I feel a little bit of guilt for not writing that paper or not doing that research. Even on vacations, there was always something academic I should have been doing.

Not anymore.

I woke up and my father asked me if I was looking for a job today. I said no, because I can do that tomorrow. And its true, I don't have any more deadlines. At this point in my life, the only person who is going to be affected by my procrastination is me.

I feel a lot like a deflated balloon.

There's another image for you.